Are you going to match your relationship?

Relationships give us a great gift for growing and learning to love ourselves and our significant other unconditionally. But very often we forget our self, our needs, wants and desires. We can fall in love.

Some women, no matter how successful, or strong, give up their share. Like their social life, their time alone, even their beliefs and values or spiritual development. They don’t tend to talk about their needs or aspirations and simply want to. Thus, they end up being held or forgotten.

You may think that you are knowingly hiding many reasons. For example, you can consciously avoid arguments for fear of conflict. Fear has been learned from the way your parents fought a lot.

However, the underlying causes that we make ourselves invisible or integrate into our partner’s world are basically an unconscious act. Which over time our personal needs and aspirations fade away, where they are no longer important. These become like a distant dream that we once believed was possible, but no less important or completely forgotten.

How we appear in all our relationships is a reflection of what we have learned about interpersonal relationships as we grow older. Trauma experienced in childhood greatly affects our ability to maintain self-awareness and feelings of empowerment in relationships.

Unprotected trauma does not create the kind of foundation on which a healthy relationship can develop. I mean, a relationship in which you feel completely loved by yourself when you are both dissatisfied with the relationship when one or both partners become unconscious and hold on to past pains that are deeply buried in the sensitive body and the physical body.

So what did you learn from your parents?
You learned to be independent and to value who you are? Did you hear our voices?
Were you treated just as important as your siblings, especially men in the family?
Have you been taught to speak and make your needs and voices and not feel selfish to do so?
Did mom and dad consider each other equal?
Or did Mam play the role of a peacekeeper to avoid conflict at any cost?

Sophie, 38, explained to me that she had grown up believing that the only way to make sense of it was to marry a rich man. As a result, Sophie thought the only way she could develop her own values; Will be through supporting her husband’s success.

In other words, Sophie's needs could be met by fulfilling her partner's wishes. She was able to believe in her needs as a woman, not so important.

And that's exactly what happened. He met and married a very successful businessman. At first, it seemed that Sophie wanted exactly what she wanted. People respect him. He felt important. He felt significant for the first time in his life.

But a few years later he realized how empty and lonely his life really was. Her whole world was all around pleasing her husband.

He made a statement, which he feared for criticism, always looking good for him. Sophie wanted not to let him down.

The appearances were something that her husband was fanatical about. Sophie also spent a lot of time maintaining an outhouse to get to his house.

Sophie woke up to the fact of disarmament that for years she had allowed herself to disappear.

He did not know who she was. The real shock after a divorce is that she doesn’t know how to live her life for herself.

She was conditioned to ignore her own needs, of course, it was difficult for Sophie to think literally even for herself.

She had no idea how to connect with Sophie. It took a while to find out the real Sophie. Especially where he learned to feel good about taking care of his own needs.

His biggest hurdle was to find out what it was like to feel empowered and fearless to bring his new life off the ground. But now that Sophie knows what it looks like, she is determined never to disappear again.

His ‘path to recovery’ is now full of conscious actions of self-love. But she has now discovered a happy, joyful, adventurous Sophie she never knew before.

Our biggest challenge is to keep our self-love in a self-loving way and not feel guilty.

For those of us who find ourselves missing out on relationships, our biggest challenge is learning to keep our self-love in a self-loving way.

This is not a selfish act. This is the most important change you can make. Loving yourself is a precious gift that we should all embrace perfectly.

When you reflect on past and present relationships - who appeared? Who's showing up today?

Here are 10 signs that may be hiding in your relationship.

People, please
Putting your own needs and interests first in your partner
Getting comfortable with food or alcohol
Wake up in the morning tired, restless, anxious, insecure
Feeling unnecessary
Always. Always try to fit
Home. Prefer to be at work rather than at home or at work
Make excuses to ignore your feelings
Feeling trapped
Feeling annoyed

How much have you allowed yourself to be displayed in your relationship?

Leave these thoughts with you ...
How much of your relationship is a reflection of your truth?
Are you signaling to be fully present without considering what is happening?
Or do you pull back, retreat and hide?
In other words, is your relationship filled with your presence every day? Do you want to show the reality?

Or are you hiding something in your place?

Fear of disappearing into your relationship? Want your energy back? Do you want to be able to show your true nature? Please book your free 'I want to be visible and empowered' no obligation breakthrough session here

Read More related topics: Does anyone always have to win?

Are you going to match your relationship?